The Sparkling Pacific

I am really grateful that we made the trip by land over this massive country of ours. It was such a huge transition that I needed the long hours of driving and watching the land change. I have been through many corners of this country before, but mostly in my early twenties, and the wild western landscapes reminded me of my wild, indomitable spirit at that time. The wild mountains and ranges of the southwest feel like part of my personal landscape and past. This time I viewed things more calmly, but no less lovingly or critically. As Ani Difranco said….”and you’re surrounded by a world full of things that you just can’t excuse.” I love this country, there is no place on earth like it and our story is like nothing else, so full of hope and promise and brutality and almost magical good fortune on occasion. This country of ours is so rich in beauty and resources and story. And sometimes so horrifying in its abuses of those gifts.

In our drive through the belly and the bowels of America over the last week we have seen some excruciating beauty and some stunning horrors, next to or juxtaposed on each other on the side of the highway. The desolate, abandoned downtowns of Oklahoma ringed by corporate chains and lot after lot after lot of evangelical churches. The welcoming bustle and pride of a popular small town burger joint at lunchtime on a Saturday. The muddy, stinking factory farm beef feedlots in the Texas panhandle. The smell of sage and the magic and energy of the high desert in New Mexico. The incredible charm and plethora of beautiful things in Santa Fe. The unnatural, orderly, layered earth of strip mines and leachfields cutting into the mineral rich buttes of western New Mexico and Arizona. The red rock canyon walls of Sedona glowing in the sunrise as Oak Creek flows through the sycamores and the canyon wren trills its descending song. That miraculous, green jewel, the true desert oasis of Palm Springs amidst the creosote flats, using its precious groundwater on pesticide laden golf courses and misters evaporating gallons upon gallons of water each evening over bar patrons sitting on the patios. So much beauty and horror right next to each other!


Our arrival in L.A. was no different as drove through the scorched desert passes in 100 plus heat, and down into the LA basin, descending into a cloud of blue hazy smog. LA spread out in front of us like the great, stinking, hulking beast of a city that it is. The box stores and highway passes woven together over islands of trash, with flashing billboards of seminude women and famous TV stars sparkling overhead. We sped and wove through the traffic, still headed west. The I-10 finally dipped into a tunnel and shot us out onto the edge of the sparkling blue Pacific, with big sandy beaches stretching ahead and bluffs covered with glass mansions and outrageous flowers waving in the refreshing breezes. We tucked back up Temescal Canyon to our little rented house with the big back yard full of ever blooming flowers and a seemingly endless stream of hummimgbirds and butterflys. Beauty amidst the horror.

In the last three days we have celebrated Shannon’s birthday as we dropped her off at college for the first time. We have scheduled Nick for classes at his new school. We have moved a truckload of furniture off of the lawn and into the house. We have figured out what we forgot. We have dressed up and attended a movie premier. Nick had his first job as an extra in a film. We have driven quite a bit on congested highways and ridden our bikes on bluffs above the pacific. We have heard the waves early in the morning. We have eaten Mexican. We have seen and smelt the massive plumes of smoke from the wildfires in La Canada. We have witnessed the pain of teenage hearts in transition. We have played with the dogs in the backyard. We hung some pictures. And today we walked through the local farmer’s market with fresh figs and berries and gorgeous purple eggplants overflowing amongst the children and dogs and friends chatting under the flawless, sunny blue sky. The journey through this big, wild country of ours is over and the bigger adventure is beginning. Right now I think that I am just trying to keep my feet on the ground, and feel out the earth here as my spinning head comes to rest it’s eyes on this place as my new home.